No I’m not fine: Why Zoë Kravitz is on to something

In the February issue of Elle magazine, Zoë Kravitz, the beautiful actress, model, and daughter of music legend Lenny Kravitz says she tries to be more open and honest about how she’s really feeling on any given day. Whether it’s to people she knows personally or an Uber taxi driver, Zoë says she’s more truthful when someone asks ‘how was your day?’

“Let’s let everything come to the surface,” she told the publication.

I believe she’s on to something. We’re all guilty of doing it, ‘how are you?’ or ‘are you good?’ or ‘howzit going?’ And the answer is almost always as shallow as the question; ‘I’m fine’, ‘I’m okay’, ‘it’s going’ or my favourite ‘I can’t complain, even if I did no one would listen’.

I can’t complain, even if I did no one would listen

It’s no wonder that we’re living in a society where the levels of depression and loneliness are so high; we’re disconnected and we don’t really talk. Why do we bother asking a person how they are if we don’t care to hear the answer?

I’m going to try Zoë’s approach, maybe not with strangers as yet but with colleagues, neighbours, acquaintances, friends and family. A person could be having a really bad day and all they need to make them feel better is to know that someone actually cared to ask how they are, really.

Of course, there will be days when you show genuine interest in someone and they shut you down. That’s understandable, people don’t always want to talk about what’s bothering them either because they feel it’s none of your business or they don’t want to burden you with their problems. Don’t take it personally, you have done you good deed for the day and move on.

And on the flip side, there will be times when you will be caught up in your own thoughts and concerns, and all it takes to make you feel better are the kind words of someone asking ‘seriously, how are you?’ We’re all on this journey called life together and a little compassion goes a long way sometimes.

Featured image: Issara Willenskomer/Unsplash

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